LIVE DHV – Is a DHV that one is immediately exhibiting. Examples: Palm reading/cold reading, standing up to an AMOG, visible pre-selection via having girls on your arm, etc.

AFC – [average frustrated chump]: a stereotypical nice guy who engages in supplicating and wimpy patterns around women.

AI – [Approach Invitation]: Approach Invitation. Usually a body language signal, especially eye contact, sent by a Target to you to indicate the Target wants you to approach. Hovering 5 to 10 feet from you for no real reason is common — a Proximity AI. While AI’s can be helpful, waiting for AI’s before approaching can be counterproductive.

AMOG – [alpha male of the group] this means a guy-obstacle who is more resistant to obstacle-handling tactics than most guys. Typically, this means the guy is displaying Alpha Male — leader-of-the-pack characteristics. Although, it is sometimes used to mean any guy distracting the Target or attempting to DHV by the way he treats you. The term can also mean that you distract the girl from a guy she just met that night; or a longer-term acquaintance; or keep the Target’s attention away from a guy who tries to distract you from her.

ANCHOR – An application of stimulus-response conditioning. 1) To Set an Anchor, create an emotional state in a person and provide a unique stimulus. 2) To Trigger an Anchor, provide the unique stimulus, and the emotional state will be produced in that person. Emotional states can be created through story telling or the Revivification of memories. Stimuli can be a touch of an area of the body that is rarely touched, or facial gesture, or making a unique sound, or sometimes a unique smell, etc. In general, telling a story will automatically anchor the emotions evoked to the storyteller; but this is sometimes weak. [Origin: Richard Bandler] See: NLP, Revivification.

ASD – [anti slut defense]: the maneuvers some women make to avoid taking responsibility for initiating or agreeing to sex; or in order to avoid appearing like a slut to the man she is with, to her friends, to society, or to herself. This can occur before or after sex, or it can prevent sex from occurring. [Origin: Yaritai]

BF – [boyfriend].

BF DESTROYER – [boyfriend destroyer]: a pattern, routine, or line a pickup artist uses with the intention of seducing a woman who has a boyfriend.

BITCHSHIELD – a woman’s defensive response to deter unknown men who approach her. Though her reaction to an opening line may be rude, this does not necessarily mean the woman herself is rude, or even impossible to engage in a conversation.

BLUR – an occurrence in which a woman stops returning calls, although she was initially interested in the man.

BUYING TEMPERATURE – the degree to which a woman is ready to make intimate physical contact with a man. Unlike attraction, a high buying temperature generally appears and fades quickly. To maintain a woman’s level of physical interest over a longer period of time, a pickup artist attempts to pump her buying temperature with fast-paced routines. [Origins: Tyler Durden]

CALIBRATE – to read the verbal and nonverbal responses of a person or group and accurately deduce what they are thinking or feeling at the moment. [Origin: Richard Bandler and John Grinder]

CANNED – A routine, pattern, story, etc. that has been memorized through repetition. Especially useful for the beginner PUA, it takes pressure off of thinking up something “good” to say. To “can” material, you must do it live in sets, 10 times, according to Mystery. [Origin: Mystery]

CAVEMAN – To directly and aggressively escalate physical contact, and progress toward sex with consenting women.

CHICK CRACK -Games and Routines that usually involve Cold Reading that offer psychological or psychic insights into the Target’s fate and real self (not the face she hides behind during day-to-day life). See: Tyler Durden’s Explanation on The Mystery Method Forums., IVD, Cold Reading, Superstition [Origin: Tyler Durden]

CIALDINI – Author of Influence. Cialdini’s 6 core principles of Influence: 1) Commitment and Consistency: Once you commit yourself to a position, you have a tendency to behave consistent with the position. 2) Liking: We obey those we like. 3) Reciprocity: When someone gives you something, you want to give something back — EVEN IF YOU DON’T LIKE THEM!!! 4) Scarcity: When something is rare, you want it more. 5) Authority: We obey those we perceive to have authority. 6) Social Proof: We look to the crowd to tell us how to behave or treat a person, idea, thing, etc.; especially when we are in unfamiliar territory.

COCKBLOCK – A person who interferes with a pickup artist’s game, whether accidentally or on purpose.

C&F, CF, C/F – [Cocky & Funny]: Referring to the Cocky & Funny techniques taught by David DeAngelo’s Double Your Dating.

COLD READING – To make statements that appear to be true of the other person, that seem to be too specific to be mere guessing. May include prediction of future events. Often attributed to psychic powers, or psychological expertise. See: Superstition, Chick Crack, Cold Reading Lines Thread on the Mystery Method Forums

CRASH AND BURN – to be directly, and often rudely, rejected or turned away by a woman or group one has just approached.

DAY TWO – When you meet the Target at another time, after the initial sarge. Alternative to “Date” and all of its negative connotations. Also: second meeting

DHV – [demonstration of higher value]: According to Mystery this means: 1) Being a Leader of Men or 2) Being Pre-Selected by Women. This can be done through stories, live demonstrations on the Target, the Target’s Set, or a pawned Set, etc; and must not look like bragging-with-intent to impress the target. [Origin: Mystery] See: Pre-Selection, Target, Set, Pawning.

DISQUALIFIER – An indirect element, a softener, which tells the Target that you are not available. This gives you time to DHV without looking like you are hitting on her. You may need an antidote to the disqualifier when you get to A3. See: Mystery Method. [Origin: Style]

DOGGY DINNER BOWL LOOK – The entranced expression a woman gets in her eyes when she is attracted to a man who is talking to her. Also: DDB. [Origin: Ross Jeffries]

ELICIT VALUES – to draw out, through conversation, what is important to a person, usually with the intention of reaching a deep inner desire that motivates them.

FALSE TAKEAWAY – see takeaway

FALSE TIME CONSTRAINT – see time constraint

FB – [fark buddy]: a women who a man engages in casual sex, absent of emotional attachment.

FIELD – The public place where sarging occurs

FIELD REPORT – A written account of a PUA’s ventures. It is usually posted online.

FLAKE – A situation where a women cancels or does not show up at a designated meeting place.

FLUFF – Typical small talk between two people.

FMAC [field, meet, attract, close] – The basis of Mystery’s method (and pretty much all PU styles).

FRAME – The context in which a person, place, or thing is perceived. [Origin: Richard Bandler and John Grinder]

FREEZE OUT – To ignore a women in order to have her seek validation from you.

FULL CLOSE – Sexual intercourse.

GOOGLE – A semi-neologism (original meaning is a very large number) for a constructed state (of mind) that is highly conducive to sarging. This state is different for different people but in general can include: certainty, playfulness, cockiness, compassion, joking, outgoing, etc. [Origin: Ross Jeffries]

GROUP THEORY – The idea that women are found in groups, and to win that woman her friends in the group must be won over.

HB – [hot babe]

HIRED GUNS – Females in the service industry that are usually recruited for their good looks, such as strippers, waitresses, etc.

HOOK POINT – The point where the PUA company is enjoyed by the group and that group does not want the PUA to leave. [Origin: Style]

INSTANT DATE – To take a recently met girl from one venue to another such as from a bar to dinner. [Origin: Mystery]

IOD – [indicator of disinterest]: Anything that indicates disinterest. Either to or from the Target. This can mean anything from talking to another person in the set while ignoring the Target, to Negs told to others in the set about the Target — or directly to the Target so that the Target’s set thinks you are not hitting on her. Or the Target may look away from you with a look of boredom, or just ignore you are sitting right next to her. See: Neg

IOI – [indicator of interest] Anything that indicates interest. An IOI can be sent from you to the Target, or from the Target to you. Body language signals, eye contact, the Target asking you questions (“Are you single?”, “Are you gay?”, “What do you do?”), etc. are examples of IOI’s. [Origin: Mystery]

IVD – [interactive value demonstration]: A type of DHV where you play a game where you win and the Target loses; or where you interact with her in a way that shows you know more about her real self than she does (Speed Seduction “be an authority on her world”). This can be anything from thumb wars to bar bets to elicitation of core values. [Origin: Style] See: EV, Speed Seduction, Chick Crack

KINO – [from kinesthesia]: Touching, Usually with the Target

KISS-CLOSE – To kiss with a person.

LJBF [let's just be friends] – A slammer statement uttered by women that essentially closes the door on any chance of you ever sleeping with her.

LMR [last minute resistance] – This usually happens when she is almost naked and resists having sex. She does not want to be seen as a slut who sleeps with guys on the “X”th date. “Will you respect me in the morning?” is the stereotypical question she is implicitly asking. See: Negation, Riker’s 3 Rules, Freeze Out

LSE [low self-esteem] – A girl whose insecurity causes her to engage in self-effacing behavior. [Origin: MrSex4uNYC]

LTR [long-term relationship] – a girlfriend.

MANAGE EXPECTATIONS – To let the woman know before sleeping with her the state of the intended relationship as to not raise expectations.

MLTR [multiple long-term relationship] – A woman who is just one of many women that you are dating.

MM [mystery method] – A seduction system created by Mystery (Erik Von Markovic). It involves 3 Main Phases, each with 3 steps. Attract: A1, A2, A3; Comfort: C1, C2, C3; Seduction: S1, S2, S3. A1: Open, say something. A2: F2M, female to male attraction; use DHV to get her attracted. A3: M2F, male to female attraction, make her Qualify to your standards, make her feel that you want her for more than her looks. C1: Connection, at pickup location. C2: Trust, at comfort-building location. C3: Intimacy, at seduction location. S1: Arousal. S2: LMR. S3: Sex. The steps are not always linear and take 7 hours of interaction (over 1 or more meetings) according to Mystery. See: Open, DHV, LMR, Qualifying

MODEL – To mimic the behavior of another person. [Origin: Richard Bandler and John Grinder]

MPB [male pattern blindness] – The inability for a man to recognize a woman is attracted to him during the time they meet.

MPUA [master pick-up artist] – Top 1% of pick-up artists.

NEG – A form of IOD intended to knock the Target off of her Pedestal, at the same time Not Conveying Interest. Mystery changed the term from “Neg Hit” to “Neg” to make it less negative. It is the opposite of a compliment, but does-not-appear to be intended as an insult. [Origin: Mystery] See: Neg Hit Thread on the Don Juan Forums, IOD, Pedestal, 101 Theory

NEWBIE MISSION – An activity meant to help shy men to overcome Approach Anxiety.

NLP [neuro-linguistic programming] – While this could be a long entry, the important thing to know is that NLP refers to a type of covert hypnosis. The Brain (neuro) responds to words (linguistic) at an unconscious level; and works in sequences (programming). So if I were to write about the Eiffel tower, you probably have an automatic picture of what I’m talking about, and there was no way to prevent that image popping into your mind, without warning. [Origin: Richard Bandler] See: Pattern

NONVERSATION – A conversation where one person is not actively listening to the other.

NUMBER CLOSE – To get a phone number from a person.

OBSTACLE – The girls and guys who distract the Target or otherwise block you from interacting and seducing the Target. They may come from inside or outside the set. While they do get in the way, this term masks the ability to DHV to the Target by interacting with the Obstacle; for example, Tyler Durden has said that it’s easier to PU a SHB with her BF (than without) because you can DHV by the way you treat him. [Origin: Common Term] [Syn. Cock Block, Anchor (not to be confused with the NLP Anchor)] See: Target, Set

ONE-ITIS – A disorder commonly found in AFCs, that forces them to think that one chick is so special that they’ll do ANYTHING to get into her panties. The most common cure for this disease is to go out and fark a Baker’s Dozen of other chicks to see that one piece isn’t that special.

OPENER – Statements used to initiate conversation with a person.

OUTALPHA – see AMOG

PASSIVE DHV – Anything that hints at previous or future indicators of value. Example: embedding a story with pre-selection or any other DHV.

PATTERN – A pattern is a sequence of NLP steps that may involve such things as Anchoring, Visualizations, and Revivifications; Intended to take the Target from their current state (of mind) or attitude to a more useful state or attitude (in this context: for seduction). See: NLP, Anchor, Visualization, Target.

PATTERN INTERRUPT – An unexpected statement designed to stop conversation.

PAWN – Enhanced social proof. A PAWN can be any woman in any situation, doesn’t have to be a friend or acquaintance of yours, and can be created on the fly. On-the-fly PAWNs are best for building up social proof literally out of thin air, snowballing into more PAWN opportunities and further enhancing your status in the eyes of any potential targets (even ones you have not seen yet). PAWNS can be unwitting participants or completely willing to help your game. [Origin: Mystery]

PEACOCK – to dress in a loud, outrageous manner in order to attract women’s attention.

PHASE-SHIFT – To make a transition during a one on one conversation with a girl to a more slow, deeper, sexually charged talk; intended to precede a kiss. [Origin: Mystery]

PIVOT – A woman (LJBF material or one of your MLTRs) who you can use as social proof when out on PU session. Used to enhance your status in the eyes of any potential targets (even ones you have not seen yet).

PROXIMITY ALERT SYSTEM – Realizing that a group of women are awkwardly close in hopes to be approached. Usually they have backs turn as to seem nearby by accident.

PU [pick-up] – To Pick Up a girl, to attract, seduce, get her phone number, etc.

PUA [pick-up artist] – A guy who seduces girls he doesn’t know. While there is artistry involved, this term masks the “field-tested” science that may also be involved. [Origin: Common Term]

PUSH-PULL – Giving indications of interest followed by indications of disinterest to a girl in order to increase attraction. [Origin: Swinggcat]

QUALIFING – To show that you meet someone’s explicitly or presupposed stated standards. In general, qualifying is AFC behavior. You want the Target to Qualify to you; and avoid Qualifying to the target. Often the Target will attempt to get you to qualify to her through tests. DHV is not seen as qualifying because she has not thrown out a test. However, if for example she were to say that she’s not sure if you’re adventurous enough; and you respond with a personal adventure story, then you are qualifying to her, not DHVing. See: DHV, IVD, Supplication, AFC

RAFC – [reformed average frustrated chump] – Recovering Average Frustrated Chump. A guy who realizes consciously that he is an AFC and is taking the steps to correct the situation. A lot of guys have chosen to deprecate this acronym in favor of GPUA (Green PUA), which is much more positive. In that regard, a guy is only RAFC for the moment he realizes his AFCness and chooses the path to PUAdom. Once choosing that path, he becomes a GPUA. Some guys make use of a small “r” in rAFC to denote that their recovery from AFCdom is still being worked on. So, if you can follow this logic, the levels of skill, in order of precedence are: WBAFC, BAFC, AFC, rAFC, RAFC, GPUA, PUA, PUM, PUG (although PUM and PUG are rarely used). Most guys in the western hemisphere are AFC.

REFRAME – To change the context in which a person sees a person, place, or thing. [Origin: Richard Bandler and John Grinder]

ROUTINE – Prepared (and field tested) material used to initiate, maintain, and advance interaction with a woman.

RSD – [Real Social Dynamics]

SARGE – To go out and interact with women with the overarching intent of seducing them, or practicing seduction skills. A metaphor of cat-like exploration and playfulness with its cat toys and environment. [Origin: Ross Jeffries' cat, Sargy, who reportedly has feline aids]

SARGEAHOLIC – Like an alcoholic, except addicted to wanting to meet, pick-up, and seduce women.

SECOND MEETING – a first date. Also: day two

SELF POINT – Discreetly pointing to oneself while talking about a characteristic, feeling, or positive topic. Use of NLP visual anchoring. [Origin: Ross Jeffries]

SELLING d1ck – Originated from a chapter in Rules of the Game when it referred to a woman’s sense of knowing what you’re up to by approaching them. It made reference to a Chris Rock bit in which he said that every time a man talks to a woman, all the woman hears is, “How about some d1ck?” Selling d1ck is an opener/story/question/action that telegraphs too much interest too soon, or is an attempt to force the interaction to continue. Examples: What classes are you taking? Whats your major? Where are you from? Or an opener that bombs, and they say, “Why are you talking to us? is that a line? I have a boyfriend.” You may counter this with a neg.

SET – A group of people, usually all girls if not a Mixed Set. Mixed Set: A group with at least one guy and one girl in it. [Origin: Common Term] [Note: I personally use numbers, for example: "2-3 set" to refer to a set of 2 girls and 3 guys.]

SHB – [super hot babe]: an extremely attractive woman.

sh1t TEST – When a chick does or says something, which is meant to judge the reaction or response from a male, whether the test is done consciously or unconsciously. The specific words of the response are less meaningful than the method and mode (attitude) of the response.

SHOTGUN NEG – A Neg designed to insult target while entertaining the group.

SNIPER NEG – A Neg designed to embarrass a women during a one-on-one talk.

SOCIAL PROOF – The concept that when you are seen with other women (or keeping a crowd entertained) your social status is raised in the eyes of HBs in the near vicinity. Other forms of display can be seen as social proof (chummy with everyone at a certain place, at ease in your environment, etc.)

SOD – [Statement of Disinterest]

SOI – [Statement of Intent/Interest]: A verbal statement of intimate interest or intent; to or from the Target. [Origin: Rio]

SRT – [signal recognition technology]: A type of strategy elicitation, especially strategies conducive to a seductive state of mind in the Target. [Origin: Ross Jeffries]

SS – [speed seduction]: A seduction system created by Ross Jeffries. The core concepts are: “capture and lead the imagination and feelings” of the Target; be an authority on the Target’s world; and create a productive “google” state (of mind) in yourself first. This is done primarily through patterns, stories, poems, etc. See: NLP, Pattern, Google

STALE – All available sets have been approached in a venue.

SUBCOMMUNICATION – Non-verbal communication

SUPPLICATE – To place one in an inferior position in order to please a woman.

TAKEAWAY – A pickup technique in which a man who had approach and getting along, leaves (or acts like he is leaving) in order to demonstrate lack of neediness and increase her attraction to him.

TARGET – The girl you have selected to seduce. [Origin: Common Term] See: Obstacle

THREE-SECOND RULE – A guideline stating that a woman or set should be approach within 3 seconds of initially seeing her. This is to prevent 1) nervousness and 2) the girl from perceiving the man as a creep by him staring to long at her. [Origin: Mystery]

TIME CONSTRAINT – To inform a set that you have to leave soon. This lowers a woman anxiety about being approached as the approacher will leave soon. [Origin: Style]

TIME DISTORTION – A PUA technique that causes the woman to think she has known the PUA for longer than she really has.

TRANCE WORDS – The words a person uses often to communicate. If a PUA learns these words, and repeats them to the target, then he can create a stronger bond by perceived stronger connection with him. [Origin: Richard Bandler and John Grinder]

TRIANGULAR GAZING – A suggestive look at a woman?s lip, then back to her eyes before attempting a kiss.

UG – [ugly girl] [Syn. War Pig] See B, HB, SHB.

WBAFC – [way-below average frustrated chump]

WING – A guy with whom you go sarging.

WINGWOMAN – see pivot.

YES LADDER – A series of questions designed to have the woman say “yes” in order to have her respond more positively to an intended open-ended question.

To build true confidence there are only two things holding you back. Beliefs and lack of experience. If you have negative beliefs and really feel them on an emotional; level then most likely thats gonna stop you from getting confidence. But if you do have positive beliefs but just lack experience then whenever you do something courageous you automatically get confidence. For me I thouight the only way to get out of my negative situation was too just get out of my comfort zone.

Boy was I wrong. No matter what I did I didnt feel like I was getting the right amoubnt of confidence for the things I was doing. Then I started working on my beliefs through some NLP work and realized that my beliefs were whats holding me back. After doing some inner game and belief work I started feeling like I was getting what I deserved. So the things that are holding you back are your beliefs or lack of experience.

First, what id suggest is to just go out experimenting and start small. Approach average woman and just start conversations with them and see if your getting more and more confident. If not then get to work on your beliefs. If you dont know where to turn for your beliefs then, honestly, just quit thinking so much and go out and do it.